Paleo, keto, whole30, low carb, low fat, protein rich, South Beach, etc...all these have something in common--they are all diets designed for weight loss. I could name many more, but that's not the point. The point is that society has said that being a certain size is desirable, while other sizes are not. We have an entire culture built around looking good at all costs, and it destroys lives. Even those who fit the model of beauty standards still struggle to stay within those standards. It seems that to be beautiful in society's eyes, one must be insane to follow all the rules and regulations to do so. Does this seem healthy to you?
I am no waif. In fact, I am not thin, nor will I ever be thin. I am healthy, and I am burning fat, and I am happy with who I am. It's taken a long time for me to get to this point in my journey, and as time goes on, I will get to another point as I take in new information. I've realized that I don't need to starve myself to be thin, nor do I have to follow someone's diet rules to be healthy. I make my own path in life.
Living healthy and sane means that you need to do what is best for you and no one else. If you feel powerful, energetic, and ready to tackle the world, then you are living healthy. You don't need to live by someone else's rules, but you do need some guidelines to live by.
One, take life moment by moment. If you eat something that doesn't make you feel healthy or energetic, don't beat yourself up about it. Acknowledge that you ate it, forgive yourself, and move on with life. It's NO BIG DEAL!. Relax and get back to where you want to be.
Two, avoid your trigger foods for three months before you begin to replace them with substitutes. For me, it was pastries and other baked goods. I focused on meats, eggs, no sugar added dairy, and vegetables for three months. My taste for those sweets actually disappeared, and the cravings are not so strong anymore. When you are ready to have your favorite trigger foods, look for acceptable substitutes and/or recipes for the eating plan you want to follow.
Three, you need to decide what is healthy and acceptable to you. If you feel that eating meat makes you sick, then don't eat meat. If eating dairy makes you feel awful, don't eat dairy. Living sane and healthy means that you must customize your food habits to your preferences and what makes sense to you. Now obviously, there are food-like items that you may prefer but are damaging to your health. These foods are listed elsewhere on this site for your reference. These are typically the foods that cause fat gain and health issues.
Last, but not least, relax and do what you need to do. I have said this before, but really--it's your life. Take it one day at a time and don't worry so much about fitting into someone else's ideal body shape and size. You will drive yourself crazy doing so.